He didn't pay me enough....

Www. The adventures of Gryff.... Well he didn't pay me enough so here goes all the trolls secrets lol. The last four weeks or so the troll has been swinging it big time. No housework, no driving, no standing, just bed couch rest, tv, computer, zzzzzz's etc while us Berners have been working six day weeks, washing drying ironing shopping, dragging her indoors out for walks, and generally picking up all the slack. Until Saturday that is!! Her indoors managed to get us home a little early, just in time to follow the trolls car as it turned into the drive! oops! The hospital had said he could drive but he was working on the not well enough to go out, No housework route! swinging it basically. Now needless to say her indoors was not happy, having had various friends help ,feed him if we weren't there and generally help him out. The discussion that took place, I won't repeat but sufficient to say HE LOST! Anyway it was agreed that he should help with the shopping Sunday morning and the sun came up on a poor frail ageing troll who could hardly put his weight on his crutches let alone hop around a supermarket. TUFF!!! He was dropped at the front door while the car was parked, bags readied and the list read. By the time her indoors got to the door he had managed about ten steps. Now being a caring and compassionate creature with us, her indoors told him to stop messing around and get on, and finally being totally embarrassed by his poking one lady with a crutch, and lifting another's skirt she abandoned him to his own devices. Worse was to come... He managed to clear a shelf of very expensive whiskey with the top end of a crutch. I know don't ask!! Add to that the bill being exactly double what we had spent the week before and you would think she would say never again. NOT OUR TWO LEGS! He is now that deep in the proverbial poo that a mine rescue squad with blood hounds wouldn't find him. He is now expected to do all light jobs and he will be driving himself and his pawly left foot in his automatic right footed car that appears to have put on a number of miles in the last four weeks to his next hospital appointment. He now does our pate on toast, while standing on one leg (in case we catch his bad foot) as with the washing up etc. And a great time is had by us all getting so close but never actually touching the offending digit.  So the moral of this is.... DO NOT TAKE THE P@@@ out of Bernese mountain dog because it will catch up with you. Cool runnings Gryff