How embarrassing can a two legs be? OMG!!!!

Www .the adventures of Gryff..... Well I'm asking, how majorly embarrassing can a two legs be? Yesterday us Berners had a visiter in the form of aunty Sue. The last time we saw her was just before the old trout retired, so three months or so, and it's just like the old trout planned to embarrass us from the start. Cup of coffee, a cooooo aren't they sweet over the puppy's and then it should have been our turn for a fuss. Oh no, that's not allowed.... The silly old bat steps  on a puppy toy and does this enormous belly flop dive into the kitchen cupboards. She hit so hard that even the troll who was upstairs heard it and came trotting down. Aunty Sues trying to pick her up, and she's just on the floor like a sack of potatoes.  Then when she starts to get up she gets a bloody nose and a lump the size of an  ostrich egg on her head.  All that fuss, I know she's getting very very old but I mean! It's not as though the floors that far away cause she's only little. Ten minutes later she's beginning to look like the Michelin man, all bandy and wobbly. Knees all swollen up, and a shoulder that's all swollen up. I mean take her to the vets and get her sorted out!  I knew it was all a plan, because after aunty Sue had gone and we wanted our walk..... She just wouldn't take us, not for all our jumping up and down and barking our heads off.  Anyway this morning, she's a positive embarrassment to be seen with. Hobbling along, all battered and bruised and all the other dogs looking at her.  I mean we are usually the main event... What gorgeous dogs, how handsome, do they need much exercise ? Can the dogs play ? But no not this time ! Silly old thing. Well I suppose I shall just have to take  control again! Done our shopping list with the girls, so that's the trolls next job.. Including a huge set of scales to carry on weighing these fat little puppies. Remind him bout the hovering, drag all the floor cloths to infront of the washing machine so they don't get forgotten, get the girls to waft their tails about and do the dusting, then it should be lunch time. The old bats got a check up about three ths afternoon....will let you know if we need another dog walker..... And another Troll. Dozy things just walked thro the door with a set of kitchen scales.  I SAID BATHROOM SCALES. Listen when I bark at you. Don't u just love being the boss!!!! Cool runnings Gryff