SAS special ops ....SBS style (special Bernese style)

Www. The adventures of Gryff. .. The other morning when we were dragged  out for our walk, it was  minus 10 and freezing fog. What better conditions for a little camoflage practice. Went out black, and after ten minutes I was covered from paw to tail in frost and pure white. Could she find us across the fields?? IN HER DREAMS! Anyway last night I decided that I could do with a bit more practice, so I  blacked all my white bits out, and hopped over the kiddie gate from the kitchen into the hall. I crept along the hall wall, taking care to stay off the cream rug (a dead give away with black fur on) till I got to the bottom of the stairs. Now Merlin was fast asleep on the top step (a big square thing it is. Well it would have to be with Merlin lying on it) giving it the old zzzzzz zzzzzz. So gently, a paw at a time, and pinned to the wall I crept upstairs. Now our stairs tend to creak a bit, so u can imagine how light pawed I had to be. Anyway, as my nose reached the step where Merlin was asleep and I was just peeping over... He gave this enormous sneeze in his sleep, and nearly blew me back a couple of stairs. Frightened me to death..the old fart! Anyway I slid round the door frame being careful not to step on him, went belly down and crept to the bottom of the bed. There it was, all comfortable and warm, with her indoors fast asleep in the middle. Now as you know, us Berners can only get on the bed with a flying leap, but that was going to wake her up ... So how to do the next stage. Discretion is the better art of valour so I crept round to the window side, stepped onto this box thing that stands there and then across onto the bed. BIG HUGE sigh of relief . All I had to do was lie down and snuggle up and MISSION COMPLETE.  Folded the old legs up dropped down beside her...AND ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE! That @@@@@ little shit Slice n Dice was under the bloody covers and I landed on her. So much for quietly getting on the bed! Tell you what though, I will have to watch her more carefully in the future... Her camo 's so much better than ours!  To say her indoors was not happy is an understatement. All I can say is...YOUR CARD IS MARKED CAT! And I will have to try again another night. That or get a set of wellies. Wet paws means downstairs, dry paws means a double bed with all the trimmings . Cool runnings Gryff